As is evident by the fact that this is my first blog post since the summer before year 2 of medical school commenced, 2nd year is BUSY! Last year, we heard the 2nd year students grumble about how much they missed 1st year and how busy and completely consuming the ominous 2nd year was. However, as a 1st year student, it was hard to believe that things could really be that much more difficult. Little did I know, all the grumblings about 2nd year being one of the most difficult years of my academic life would indeed be indeed prove to be true. In addition to a heavy academic load that includes: Pathophysiology, Pathology, Microbiology, Pharmacology, Neurology, Psychopathology, Preventive Medicine, and Biochemistry there are the additional requirements of labs, self-study lectures, continuity clinics, medical simulation labs, clinical skills OSCEs, and the ever-looming Step 1 test that will basically determine which residency programs we will be eligible for upon completing medical school. Throw in extracurricular service activities, time to eat (cooking optional), exercise, spending time with loved ones, and devoting time to building a relationship with God and needless to say, there are never enough hours in the day to accomplish everything with the type of perfectionistic approach that we medical students desire.
If you have read my blog posts prior to this, you must be thinking, “Wow, this girl has suddenly become quite the Debbie Downer!” I hope that you will continue to read however, because it has been this process of fully realizing the difficulty and challenges of medicine that has shown me even more of the immense value of this profession that I have chosen to pursue. Moreover, it has shown me that even when things get tough—which they do—if you have the right support system, priorities, and determination, it can be done!
As I sit here on my last weekend of Christmas break and reflect over the past few months since beginning this year, I can honestly say that there have been many times, in fact, the majority of times when I have not had my priorities straight. Relationships with family, friends, and God have all been stretched to the limit as I have put school again and again at the top of my priority list. I have always had to work hard in school, but I have always been up for the challenge and have always truly enjoyed the process of learning. Yet, at the beginning of this Christmas break I was exhausted, burnt out, and dreading the thought of once again immersing myself in the firehose of information that never gets turned off. As far as I was concerned, the challenge was starting to look like it was a bit more than I could handle.
However, God showed me once again in a most unsuspecting way that He was the one guiding and sustaining me down this career path. On New Year’s Eve my family had the opportunity to visit the Reagan National Library near my sister’s house in Ventura, California. There are thousands of quotes scattered throughout this exhibition of President Reagan’s life story and accomplishments, and it would take days to read all of the information provided about the life of this incredible man. We only had a few hours to walk the museum so we casually perused the information, taking note of just the main highlights. One quote, tucked away in the volumes of information, stood out to me immediately. It was spoken by President Reagan on his inauguration day and read, “I consider the trust that you have placed in me sacred, and I give you my sacred oath that I will do my utmost to justify your faith.”
Upon reading this quote, I was immediately struck with awe at the relevance it had in my own life. It reminded me of that day a year and half ago when I recited a sacred oath “To Make Man Whole” and received a white coat that would signify the sacred trust of many patients that I would soon encounter. I have no doubt that God used this quote to remind me of the reasons why I am currently working so diligently to conquer this difficult 2nd year of medical school. As I look to begin this last 6 months of year 2, I am reinvigorated by this reminder of the sacred trust that has been placed in us as healthcare providers, and our sacred oath to be the best physicians that we can be in order to justify the faith that our future patients will have in us.